Tuesday, May 28, 2013

secret

Im glad we have reached this far, girl.
We made it to week 38 now!

I am no longer go to work, stay at home, waiting.
Can't believe I am reaching to the finish line already.
Eight months and three weeks - carrying a baby girl in my tummy.
And within the period, it made me 16kg heavier now.
And within the period also, I had to go through the mood swings.
I handled it well, I think. Or at least, tidak pernah menyusahkan sesiapa.

With all these, I deserve a reward. I believe in reward system.

Thank you to all my support system - the people around me.
For taking care of me, for being thoughtful and for the understanding.

On a different note,

I secretly feel disappointed for the thing that happened today.
I secretly feel sad for not having what I want as a reward.
I secretly feel upset for the fact that I had to make decision on my own over someone else's mistake.
I secretly feel that my no. 1 shoulder-to-cry-on should be the shoulder.
I just secretly feel disappointed.

I secretly feel I should put a smile on my face all the time now,
because I just secretly feel that the baby will pop out within 10 days.

and I secretly feel that I have to go through the delivery alone.

I am just worried.

Please pray everything will do just great, a smooth delivery.

Amin.